Abiding Phrases

What has developed through your earlier work

Across the material I could retrieve, your practice has evolved in a meaningful direction:

• In 2024: “There is suffering” followed by “There is LOVE,” Jesus, or the Father.
• In 2025: moving from “I am suffering” to “There is suffering” gave you space from identification and helped despair and sadness soften.
• In early 2026: this became Noting → Abiding → Blessing, including memories whose emotional charge might gradually soften without erasing the memory.
• In July: the essential rhythm became “Pain … and … Abiding.”
• More recently: you discovered that “Jesus in the accident” felt softer than “Jesus with the accident,” while “Jesus abiding…” brought the greatest peace and joy.

The important development is this:

The practice is moving from replacing suffering with Love to allowing suffering and Love to be present together.

Suffering is not denied, hurried away, spiritualized, or made into your identity. It is given a gentle companion.

The three-part practice

I would formulate it this way:

1. Note impersonally — left hand

   “Yes, There is fear.”

2. Welcome through the gentle “and” — the space between the hands

   “And…”

3. Name the abiding source — right hand

   “Jesus is abiding here.”

The complete phrase is:

“Yes, There is fear … and … Jesus is abiding here.”

The structure can be remembered as:

Note → And → Abide

Your longer teaching name could remain:

Note → Welcome → Name the Abiding Source

The “and” is the hinge. It means neither suffering nor sacred presence must disappear before the other can be acknowledged.

Jesus Abiding: how the wording changes the experience

Jesus says, “Abide in me, and I in you.” John 15 presents abiding as mutual indwelling, continuing relationship, love, and eventually fruitful action—not simply temporary comfort. John 15:4–10

Christian Welcoming Prayer has a closely related orientation: consenting to God’s presence and action within our physical and emotional reactions rather than waiting until those reactions disappear. Contemplative Outreach

Your own bodily response suggests an important personal distinction:

• With gives suffering a companion.
• In gives suffering a larger home.
• Abiding adds continuity: Jesus does not merely visit the painful place; Jesus remains.

Word order also changes the practice

Suffering first: truth before consolation

“There is sadness, and Jesus is abiding.”

This makes sure spiritual language does not conceal or bypass the pain.

Jesus first: safety before contact

“Jesus is abiding here, and there is sadness.”

Use this when direct contact with suffering feels too intense.

The body first: tenderness rather than analysis

“Shaking is here, and Jesus abides with this frightened body.”

The memory first: present-time perspective

“A memory is arising, and Jesus is abiding with me now.”

Abiding first: begin inside the resource

“Held in Jesus’ abiding love, I notice that fear is here.”

None is universally best. The right phrase is the one that permits both truth and gentleness in your body.

Small words with large effects

Other useful distinctions:

• “This fear” gently points to an experience.
• “My fear” gives ownership but may create more identification.
• “A wave of fear” emphasizes movement and impermanence.
• “Fear is here” is warmer and less formal than “There is fear.”
• “Fear may be here” adds permission.
• “Fear is welcome” adds warmth, but may be too strong when the nervous system does not yet feel safe.
• “Jesus abides” feels timeless and scriptural.
• “Jesus is abiding” feels active, present and ongoing.
• “Jesus, abide here” is a prayer or invitation.
• “Jesus is here” is an affirmation of trust.

Naming emotion can itself support regulation: an influential neuroimaging study found that putting feelings into words was associated with reduced amygdala and other limbic responses to negative images. This supports the value of gentle noting, although it does not prove that any particular wording will work for everyone. Lieberman et al., PubMed

A Jesus Abiding phrase collection

For ordinary moments:

• “There is anxiety, and Jesus is abiding.”
• “Pressure is here, and Jesus is abiding with this breath.”
• “There is uncertainty in the spaciousness of Jesus.”
• “Jesus, abide in my words and in my silence.”
• “There is tiredness, and I remain in Jesus.”
• “There is anger, and Jesus is abiding with wise boundaries.”
• “There is loneliness, and Jesus will not leave this place.”
• “This too may rest in Jesus’ abiding love.”
• “Nothing needs to be forced. Jesus is abiding.”
• “There is suffering—and Love is still here.”

For difficult memories:

• “A painful memory is arising, and Jesus is abiding with me now.”
• “There was danger then; Jesus is with this body now.”
• “This memory is in my left hand; Jesus’ abiding love is in my right.”
• “Jesus, abide with the younger Ross who could not yet understand.”
• “The memory may remain; its loneliness may soften.”
• “Jesus is abiding in me while this memory passes through awareness.”
• “This suffering is seen, held and accompanied.”
• “What happened is not happening now. Jesus is abiding here.”
• “I do not have to enter the whole memory. Love can meet this one small feeling.”
• “May what was isolated now belong in Love.”

Buddha and other wisdom sources

Early Buddhist mindfulness recognizes painful feeling as painful, observes its arising and passing, and establishes awareness without grasping. That is close to your impersonal noting, although “There is suffering and Buddha” is your own interspiritual development rather than a traditional universal Buddhist formula. Satipaṭṭhāna Sutta

Different Buddhist traditions understand Buddha differently, so these may sometimes be more natural:

• “There is suffering, and Buddha-wisdom is present.”
• “There is pain, and compassion is abiding.”
• “This painful feeling is known within awareness.”
• “There is fear, and the awakened heart does not turn away.”
• “Buddha-nature remains unstained by this passing wave.”
• “There is grief, held within boundless compassion.”
• “Kuan Yin’s listening compassion is with this sorrow.”
• “Tara’s fearless compassion accompanies this frightened body.”

Other sources can create different qualities:

• Holy Spirit: “There is confusion, and the Spirit is abiding within.”
• Mary: “There is grief, and Mary’s tenderness holds this heart.”
• God: “There is suffering, and God remains.”
• Love: “Yes. There is suffering. And. Love.”
• Universe: “There is sorrow, and the Universe holds this breath.”
• Life: “There is uncertainty, and Life is still carrying me.”
• Earth: “There is fear, and the Earth is supporting this body.”
• Pure Mind: “There is disturbance within the stillness of Pure Mind.”
• Awareness: “There is pain, known within spacious awareness.”
• Wise Self: “Hurt is here; Ross will not abandon Ross.”
• Compassionate humanity: “There is suffering, and I am not alone among human beings.”

Choose the name that evokes an actually felt relationship. The phrase need not be theologically impressive; it needs to be receivable.

Two-Hand Abiding practice

1. Orient to the room. Feel your feet and notice the current date and place.
2. Let your left hand represent only what is presently tolerable: perhaps tightness, sadness or one fragment of a memory.
3. Say: “There is ______.”
4. Pause. Breathe low and slowly if comfortable.
5. Say the hinge by itself: “And…”
6. Let the right hand represent Jesus, Love, Compassion or Awareness.
7. Say: “Jesus is abiding here.”
8. Notice both hands simultaneously. Nothing has to be removed.
9. If it feels right, bring the hands slightly closer and ask: “What is Love inviting now?”

The answer may be rest, tears, movement, prayer, a boundary, contacting someone, or simply drinking some water.

For the purification of past suffering

I would define “purification” very carefully:

Not making the past pure, not approving what occurred, and not erasing memory—but releasing some of the fear, resistance, isolation and bodily charge surrounding it.

The memory can remain while its relationship to you changes. It becomes accompanied rather than abandoned.

Work with a small amount, not the entire event:

“One image is arising … and … Jesus is abiding with me in this room.”

Then return attention to your feet, the room, daylight, sounds, and present safety. The US National Center for PTSD similarly recommends orienting to where and when you are, reminding yourself that the trauma is in the past, and grounding in the present. If memories produce overwhelming panic, flashbacks or disconnection, stop the practice and seek support; structured trauma processing is safest with a qualified practitioner. VA grounding guidance, VA trauma-focused treatments

A personal phrase-tasting practice

Because you are sensitive to the felt effect of language, test only one change at a time:

1. Choose one experience: “There is sadness.”
2. Try each phrase for three gentle breaths:
   • “…and Jesus.”
   • “…with Jesus.”
   • “…in Jesus’ abiding love.”
   • “…and Jesus is abiding.”
   • “Jesus is abiding with this sadness.”
3. After each version, notice:
   • Truth
   • Safety
   • Warmth
   • Spaciousness
   • Companionship
   • Capacity for wise action

The best phrase is not necessarily the most beautiful one. It is the phrase through which your body feels both honestly met and gently accompanied.

My recommended master Abiding Phrase is:

“There is suffering … and … Jesus is abiding here.”

And for memories:

“A memory is arising … and … Jesus is abiding with me now.”

These preserve the whole movement of your work: truth without identification, welcome without force, sacred companionship without bypassing, and Love that eventually becomes wise action.